What would the English public think if they found out they were monkeys?

1. Can it really be true? Scientists have discovered that English people are the direct descendants of Monkeys! #SayItAintSo 2. How is it possible that English people are the direct descendants of Monkeys? I'm so confused! #MonkeyAncestry 3. So, it seems that humans didn't evolve from monkeys, but rather English people did! #MonkeyAncestry 4. I'm in shock! Scientists have discovered that English people are the direct descendants of Monkeys! #MonkeyAncestry 5. I never thought I'd hear the day that English people are related to Monkeys! #MonkeyAncestry 6. This latest discovery has me questioning everything I thought I knew about my ancestry! #MonkeyAncestry 7. No one will believe me when I tell them that English people are related to Monkeys! #MonkeyAncestry 8. Where did evolution go wrong? #MonkeyAncestry 9. I guess this explains why English people are so good at climbing trees? #MonkeyAncestry 10. Is this the end of the human race? #MonkeyAncestry 11. How did this discovery even come about? #MonkeyAncestry 12. I'm so confused! Are English people really descended from Monkeys? #MonkeyAncestry 13. This is unbelievable. Scientists have discovered that English people are the direct descendants of Monkeys! #MonkeyAncestry 14. What will this mean for the future of the human race? #MonkeyAncestry 15. Can this be true? English people are related to Monkeys? #MonkeyAncestry 16. How will this affect our society? #MonkeyAncestry 17. What implications will this have for our cultural heritage? #MonkeyAncestry 18. We might have to update our history books! #MonkeyAncestry 19. Will this be the end of the English kingdom? #MonkeyAncestry 20. I'm so confused. How could this be true? #MonkeyAncestry